- Rich Randy is a total fuckass
- has a lot of money
- richest kid in Rip Van Winkle High School
- his lavish home has been featured multiple times in the regional interior decorating periodical
- fronts Sid and Cleetus weed in exchange to hang out with them
- they really only keep him around for the weed
- Randy thinks hanging around behind the gas station is super edgy
- thinks about the edgy stuff he does behind the gas station when girls pretend he isn't talking to them
- thinks of himself as very virile
- hates getting his pants dirty and refuses to sit down on the pavement
- once tried to suck his own dick in the gas station bathroom
- but since the door doesn't lock he never really got to go all in on that one
- has an ipad mini that he carries around
- has nicer shit than Danny Blampton but everybody still hates him
- most ascots owned in all of Cloumbus County
- his dad has a grill that's more expensive than Cleetus' house
- but his dad also sucks at grilling; he uses wood pellets and it makes the meat taste like ass
- unclear as to whether his first name is "Rich", short for "Richard", or whether this is only an epithet and that his name is instead "Randall"
- perhaps it is merely an unfortunate case of the prophetical naming of a child
- Rich Randy won't go near Sid's dog
- he kind of has a thing for Barb
- Rich Randy is too young to be a fascist but is widely held to be a huge narc
- Rich Randy is a real fuckass dude and everyone hates him
meanwhile, on an adjacent plane of reality, it's FIST LAD UNIVERSE